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The ‘Clitoris’ is a part of the vagina located above the urethra (the hole through which women pee) and can be considered the pleasure center of a woman’s body. This is due to the abundance of nerve endings in the clitoris, and its vast expanse around the inner and outer walls of the vaginal opening.

“The clitoris is pure in purpose. It is the only organ in the body designed purely for pleasure.” 

Eve Ensler

You may have heard otherwise, but more or less all vaginal stimulation experienced by women is essentially clitoral. Even the mysterious G-spot is part of the clitoral network. This is likely because the clitoris is the place closest to the vagina that plays no part in childbirth. While men can afford to be pleasured by the same organ that they use for conception, the same cannot happen for women. Imagine the most sensitive part of your body experiencing long hours in labor and then tearing open to push out a baby! Sorry for the visual, but it’d be quite terrifying, and childbirth would almost certainly kill you then. Naturally, this kind of system would fail.

Now that we’ve established the ‘why’ of clitoral stimulation, let’s look at the ‘how’. Below you can take a look at the vulva:

A diagram to help you find the clitoris. It’s not that difficult to spot if you’re aroused!
Image Source: Hello Clue

Finding the Clitoris:

  • Generally, once you’ve hit puberty, this piece of flesh (which can be a little discolored) begins to hang like a hat or hood covering the urethra (your pee-hole).
  • The inner side of the hood is where the most nerve endings lie, and the tongue is the best organ to use here.
  • The clitoris swells up, much like a penis, when the woman is aroused! It’s not difficult to spot in this condition!
  • If you just want to pleasure your partner though, and still can’t find it, gently test the entirety of the vulva with your tongue. The spot that makes her quiver – that’s the clitoris!
  • The G-spot can be found on the inner walls of the vagina, 3-5 cm behind the vaginal opening.

Stimulating the Clitoris:

  • As mentioned above, the tongue is the best organ to stimulate the clitoris with. The clit’s hyper-sensitive nature can make inexperienced women queasy, especially if you use your fingers. The key is to be gentle when you lick it.
  • If you really want to use your fingers though, be extra gentle, and shift focus to the vaginal opening, so you can stimulate the clitoris from the inside (G-spot stimulation).
  • When inside, turn your hand so that the inner side faces upwards, and use the ‘Come Here’ motion to stimulate the g-spot.
  • When fingering her, make sure you don’t insert too many fingers too quick. Start with one, and make sure every time you put in a new finger, that the vagina is lubricated enough to let it slip right in.
  • Another important thing to remember is that fingers are not like the penis. They can produce stimulation through movement in the vagina, but fast and hard in-and-out strokes are not as desirable with these organs.
  • The best way to please a woman is with the tongue on the outer part of her clitoris, and the fingers on the inner walls at the G-spot. Licking and gentle sucking on one end, and the ‘come here’ motion on the other, works almost all the time.
  • To cause her to squirt, however, you would be better advised to use your mouth to suck rather than lick the clitoris.
  • If none of this works though, don’t be shy to just ask, and let her guide you around her body.

“Two generations of Americans knew more about the Ford coil than the clitoris, about the planetary system of gears than the solar system of stars.” 

John Steinbeck

Using this Information during penetrative sex:

  • Using your fingers to stimulate the hood of the clitoris while having sex can be very pleasurable.
  • Positions that hit the G-spot best are closed missionary, downward doggy, and cowgirl or woman on top, where you grind instead of bouncing.
Some of the best positions for G-spot stimulation
Image Source: Open Data Forum

What’s more? Clitoral stimulation is the only cause for orgasms in women, and orgasms release oxytocin. This hormone plays an important role in bonding and love, meaning, the more orgasms you give your girl, the more she’ll love you! But more importantly, if you’re a single woman, masturbation that is correctly directed at giving you orgasms can better your self-esteem, release stress, and drive your independent lifestyle, so give it a shot!

Raksha Saraf is an undergraduate student of Psychology looking to specialize in Sexuality and Neuroscience.…  

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